A Down Hill Slide and a Crescendo
Recently one of the well intentioned guardians of one of my students made the comment to me "You know, they just don't realize that these are the best years of their lives." Two things struck me like lightining about that statement: the sad implication it held and the contempt for the issues students are facing. I will take them in reverse order.
The way most adults treat the kids shows an attitude that says "Your issues (friends, grades, identity issues) are un-real, mine (business world, bills, possessions) are." In another conversation with some of the fine folks at Christian Campus House I came to realize just how the majority of the world scoffs at youth issues. From the long run perspective, it seems like the boy/girlfriends and grades amount to a whole lot of nothing, but it can easily be argued that so will all the bills and careers adults gather. In fact, what we suffer and how we deal with it in our youth turns out, I believe, to have a greater effect on just what bills and careers we will be dealing with later than those things will have on our life-everlasting. Maybe the rebellion that seems so strong in the youth of today is reflective of the disrespect that adults perpetuate. In fact, my next step may show that it is largely the fault of adults that there are such horrible relationships.
Take a person of any age and conduct this experiment: constantly tell him it is important that he peel potatoes, and that he should try to have fun with it. But each time the monotony or stress of peeling leads him to complain, tell him that he should be glad, that these are the best years of his life, and that he has it easy because what he is doing is not as bad as the real world. See how long anyone, much less an adult, lasts in that situation.
My point is, we make kids do something that they can't understand, we tell them it is important, but that it isn't as important as our work or our issues. Essentially, we are sending two different messages with our behavior, and out of that conflict the students look for resolution. Many just shut down their minds, follow instructions, and loose all hope of finding something real (leading to a lifetime of settling, and the inability to follow God into a big picture). The few who do resist either self-destruct or rise above the system to criticize it - and the line between those two things is finer that a razor's edge, and many children are cut on it.
My Next Thirty Years
The other side to that statement is an implication that is horrifing: if these are the best years of my life, that means that it is all downhill from here. What a terrible and terrifying thing to tell a kid - and though few consciously understand that implication, the majority live out that implication by making bad choices thinking that they better have fun now because everything else will fade and fall. Not to mention that school, highschool especially, is totally lacking in a sense of purpose or connection with the grand hope of the universe, so if this is as good as it gets, most stop looking for purpose and are willing to substitute family, work, money, fame, or just momentary pleasure for a sense of what they are really here for.
Life should be a crescendo - each new day should bring us closer to the Purpose of life, closer to Christ. I hope that when I am 40, I will look back with little regret, or at least little in the way of wanting to be 22 again. Even now, I would not want to be who I was even a year ago, because these days are good days, filled with more purpose and more life than my wandering teens - and I hope this trend continues, beause I think it is more than a trend. I want to live my life like a crescendo building to the great trumpet call of the Savior. Why don't we tell the kids that, and maybe they will find something to live for, instead of being filled with fear that they will waste the best days and have nothing but a life of regret to look forward to.
Call for Suggestions
I am working on two websites for some missions I know of, and your input would be appreciated. The sites are
Christianville, Haiti
FISH Ministry
Both are just skeletons, but the look at all I am still trying to nail.
And, actually, anyone who wants to hear me rant about something, leave a note and we shall see (that occured to me after I titled this section).
The way most adults treat the kids shows an attitude that says "Your issues (friends, grades, identity issues) are un-real, mine (business world, bills, possessions) are." In another conversation with some of the fine folks at Christian Campus House I came to realize just how the majority of the world scoffs at youth issues. From the long run perspective, it seems like the boy/girlfriends and grades amount to a whole lot of nothing, but it can easily be argued that so will all the bills and careers adults gather. In fact, what we suffer and how we deal with it in our youth turns out, I believe, to have a greater effect on just what bills and careers we will be dealing with later than those things will have on our life-everlasting. Maybe the rebellion that seems so strong in the youth of today is reflective of the disrespect that adults perpetuate. In fact, my next step may show that it is largely the fault of adults that there are such horrible relationships.
Take a person of any age and conduct this experiment: constantly tell him it is important that he peel potatoes, and that he should try to have fun with it. But each time the monotony or stress of peeling leads him to complain, tell him that he should be glad, that these are the best years of his life, and that he has it easy because what he is doing is not as bad as the real world. See how long anyone, much less an adult, lasts in that situation.
My point is, we make kids do something that they can't understand, we tell them it is important, but that it isn't as important as our work or our issues. Essentially, we are sending two different messages with our behavior, and out of that conflict the students look for resolution. Many just shut down their minds, follow instructions, and loose all hope of finding something real (leading to a lifetime of settling, and the inability to follow God into a big picture). The few who do resist either self-destruct or rise above the system to criticize it - and the line between those two things is finer that a razor's edge, and many children are cut on it.
My Next Thirty Years
The other side to that statement is an implication that is horrifing: if these are the best years of my life, that means that it is all downhill from here. What a terrible and terrifying thing to tell a kid - and though few consciously understand that implication, the majority live out that implication by making bad choices thinking that they better have fun now because everything else will fade and fall. Not to mention that school, highschool especially, is totally lacking in a sense of purpose or connection with the grand hope of the universe, so if this is as good as it gets, most stop looking for purpose and are willing to substitute family, work, money, fame, or just momentary pleasure for a sense of what they are really here for.
Life should be a crescendo - each new day should bring us closer to the Purpose of life, closer to Christ. I hope that when I am 40, I will look back with little regret, or at least little in the way of wanting to be 22 again. Even now, I would not want to be who I was even a year ago, because these days are good days, filled with more purpose and more life than my wandering teens - and I hope this trend continues, beause I think it is more than a trend. I want to live my life like a crescendo building to the great trumpet call of the Savior. Why don't we tell the kids that, and maybe they will find something to live for, instead of being filled with fear that they will waste the best days and have nothing but a life of regret to look forward to.
Call for Suggestions
I am working on two websites for some missions I know of, and your input would be appreciated. The sites are
Christianville, Haiti
FISH Ministry
Both are just skeletons, but the look at all I am still trying to nail.
And, actually, anyone who wants to hear me rant about something, leave a note and we shall see (that occured to me after I titled this section).
posted by Danny | 10:40 AM
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